Saturday, September 01, 2012

WHY I'M GETTING FAT

Yes, this site is still in hibernation, but I've just discovered something that is so astonishing, I have to share it with you right now.  

Obama is making me fat.  

You see, people who have low self-esteem and who are suffering from some form of depression have a big tendency to gain weight.  You eat too much, you drink too much and you simply don't feel like exercising.  It's dawned on me that Obama has been putting me down ever since the day he took office.  

He chastised me for clinging to my Bible and guns and I felt really crappy that day.  I had three hamburgers, nine beers and an ice cream cone; that started it.  Then he tried to convince me that I couldn't pick my own doctor, didn't create my own business... well, you get the picture.  Over the past 3-1/2 years I've run my credit card debt up to $14,000 just on food.  Hamburgers, hot dogs, beer, cheesecake and ice cream... the list is endless.  

Then, Michelle and Barry started in on me about being too fat and things got worse.  I read an article the other day about how 65% of Americans are overweight and the country is running out of food.  That's when it dawned on me... the answer to the whole thing.  If we really want to go on a diet and lose weight, we have to get rid of Obama.  

He's to blame; it's that simple.     

No comments: