No, it wasn't the Electoral College, angry white males, the Russians, Huma Abedin... the real guy to blame for Hillary's loss was a fat, rotund, evil, deplorable guy from the North Pole commonly referred to as Santa Claus.
Oh, those Democrats know what the rules are... Santa comes once a year on Christmas eve night to deliver presents throughout the land. But, Hillary wanted her Christmas present early in November, and being a Democrat... early delivery was definitely an entitlement. Nevertheless, he and his abominable dwarf cretins refused to budge and Hillary did not get her much-anticipated election present.
Santa is to blame and you, my friends, have the absolute duty to light a huge... that's yuuuge... fire in the fireplace on Christmas Eve so that the jolly fat bastard can't get into your house.
Have a Merry Christmas. See you Tuesday.
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